Child Sexual Abuse: Support for Children & Young People

We assess every client who is referred to our support services. The assessment will help:

1. Explain the limitations of counselling
2. Inform you of our policies and procedures on attending counselling
3. Explain confidentiality and ensure that the child is in agreement to attend
4. Ensure that Nexus is the most suitable service according to your child’s needs
5. Assess if there risk and safeguarding concerns the counsellor needs to be aware of
6. Gather details of background information and history, for example:

• Mental health concerns
• History of risk
• What other professional services are engaged with your child or family
• Family history
• Relevant school contact information

Yes, consistency is important to us as professionals as it helps children and young people to build trust. So once your child has started counselling, they will meet the same counsellor every week for up to 18 weeks. Sessions last for up to 50 minutes, though this may vary depending on their age; for example, a younger child may respond better to shorter sessions. 

Your child will never be forced to talk about what happened to them. In fact, most children and young people never talk about their experiences in any detail. Our specially trained CYP counsellors will work with your child through art, play or other creative practices. Your child can still work through their feelings without having to disclose the details.

With the support of the CYP counsellor, your child can learn ways to manage the emotions and feelings that they may find very overwhelming. It is important that your child understands that although they never have to talk about anything they don’t wish to, and that their counselling session is a safe place to talk about anything they need to.

There may be times when it seems like your child attends counselling just to ‘play’ but they will be working therapeutically through their feelings creatively in a safe environment.

Your child will never be forced to attend. A child being forced to attend would have the opposite effect we hope counselling to have. Sometimes children are not ready to attend counselling – it may be too overwhelming for them. Forcing them to attend when they are not ready would give them a bad experience of what counselling is, reducing the likelihood of them seeking support at an older age when they may be ready.

If your child decides counselling is not for them this time, all you have to do is let their counsellor know as soon as possible, and their counselling will end. You can refer your child back into our children service again at any time until they are 16. Once they have turned 16, they can refer themselves in to our adult services for people impacted by childhood sexual abuse. If your child has disclosed to their counsellor that they do not wish to continue, their counsellor will discuss this with you and then counselling will come to an end. It is very important that your child never feels any pressure to attend sessions.

Your child’s counselling is strictly confidential. When you agree to your child attending our service it is with the understanding that what your child discloses in the session is private. If your child wishes to discuss sessions with you, they can do so freely. It is important that you do not pressure them into telling you what has been discussed, as sometimes it can create a barrier as to what they may or may not explore during their counselling sessions.

Their counsellor will not share what is talked about privately in the sessions, but will discuss with you any safeguarding concerns or any issues that your child has given them permission to share. The only occasions your child’s counsellor will discuss anything outside of the room will be if your child discloses one or more of the following:

• They are at risk from harm from themselves
• They are risk of harm from someone else
• Another child is at risk from harm
• A crime has been committed that has not been reported
• There is a safeguarding concern in relation to themselves or someone else that has not been highlighted with the appropriate services

If any of these matters arise, we will speak to you if appropriate to do so, or to another professional service if necessary.

Yes, your child’s counsellor will take notes on their session. However, these notes are not detailed reports of the session, but instead are a guide to what emotions they have worked on or any safeguarding issues they may have.  These notes are private and confidential. We do not share these notes with anyone outside the service. The only situation in which we would share notes is if we are ordered to by a judge; in this situation, only the judge will see the notes.

We understand that as a parent or caregiver it can be very worrying to not have access to all the information. We understand that if your child is struggling it can be very distressing and upsetting to not be a part of this process. Please know that our priority is to your child’s wellbeing and safety. This is paramount to both Nexus as an organisation, and our counsellors. We will never put your child at risk in any way by withholding information.  

Our counselling consists of individual one-to-one sessions, meaning that your child will be attending the session alone. However, it is your responsibility to ensure your child is brought to and collected from sessions by an appropriate person.  

If your child is unable to attend for any reason – for example holidays, exams, or any other reason, please let their counsellor know in advance with as much notice as possible. Where a session is cancelled more than 24 hours before it’s due to commence, it will not count as one of the 18 sessions. If your child is unable to attend due to illness or another emergency please contact the office on 028 9032 6803 as soon as possible to cancel the appointment. Should a session not be attended without contact or if it is cancelled within 24 hours of the session, then it will be counted within the 18 allocated sessions. If two sessions in a row are not attended without prior contact, then the counselling will automatically end.

Remote sessions are available, however, this depends on suitability as some children do not engage well with remote sessions. Children aged 5 to 9 years old are generally not suitable for remote counselling, therefore in-person counselling at one of our regional hubs or our main office in Belfast will be recommended.  

Remote sessions are phone sessions, or video call sessions on Microsoft Teams. If the counsellor feels that remote counselling is not suitable for whatever reason, then that decision must be respected and face-to-face counselling will be offered if possible. All Nexus procedures still apply to remote counselling and the following must be strictly adhered to:

• You are on time and ready for the session as you would be for face-to-face sessions
• You provide a private and confidential space for your child to attend remotely
• No other person is in the room at any time during your child’s session
• There is an adequate and safe device for the child to use for sessions
• If the counsellor decides for any reason it is unsuitable to continue remote sessions, this is respected and honoured by Nexus
• There is a responsible adult in the same building as the child while counselling is taking place

If you have any concerns about your child or any information that may be relevant to the counselling process, you can ask their counsellor to contact you by phone privately at a suitable time outside the session. 

If you are unable to speak to a counsellor directly in person when your child is attending a session, then you can contact the Nexus office and request a call back from the counsellor. They will try to do so when available but please note this may take some time. Counsellors only have access to email messages or calls during their hours of work and are not expected to respond outside of these hours.

Sometimes the counsellor may email you some resources to help support your child. Please never reply disclosing any private or personal information. Do not email if your child is at immediate risk or in a crisis – on these occasions it is paramount that you contact the relevant crisis services such as the emergency services on 999.

If you have any concerns about Nexus counselling practices or questions in relation to any of this you can contact the office on 028 9032 6803 and ask to speak to the Clinical Services Manager.

We understand that knowing your child has been impacted by sexual abuse can cause you great distress, which is why we offer family support sessions for family members of anyone who has been impacted by sexual abusive and abusive relationships.

If you feel you would like to avail of this you can make a referral online via our self-referral form, or contact us via email or phone and ask for a member of the children’s counselling team to contact you.